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More Rock Hill Entertainment

It's Thursday, which means it's time for the Area Crime Report, live from the home office in Rock Hill Missouri:

• A fight with a head injury was reported Aug. 15 on the lot of Steger Sixth Grade Center, 701 N. Rock Hill Road. Officers arrived to find several of the city's notorious crackheads standing around one of their own, who was holding his bleeding cranium and provided officers with a bombastic explanation. Officers deduced that the injured subject threw a brick up in the air and caught it, but in a drug-induced haze later forgot the game and let the brick strike him on the noggin. The drug-fortified athlete was transported to the hospital to be sewn up.

• Officers on patrol arrested a local, up-and-coming marijuana dealer Aug. 16 for "ridin' dirty" or possessing marijuana in the 200 block of Eldridge Avenue.

Stop, Thief!

I got up to run yesterday at the typically idiotic time of 6AM. After getting geared up, I went outside to stretch for a few minutes before hitting the pavement. As I'm stretching, I notice a minivan 2 doors down on the opposite side of the street. I figure it's no big deal, because the people who live there are teachers, and are usually up and out early.

Here's where we get off track. The van goes into reverse and backs up the street, stopping at our driveway. The lady opens her door, gets out, and takes my daily copy of the St. Louis Post-Dispatch! All the while, I'm standing there in my bright red running shirt. I know I'm a lot smaller than I used to be, but I'm still hard to miss.

This lady gets back in her van and drives away - leaving me a bit stunned. At this point, I chalk it up to her being the delivery person, and we just had to renew the subscription, so maybe we just aren't back on the schedule yet.

After logging the first few miles of my run, I come to Emily's school, where I notice this van sitting in the parking lot, and this lady reading my newspaper in the front seat. At this point I thought about going to talk to her to see why she stole my newspaper, but ever the aspiring runner, I didn't want to break stride half way through my route.

I thought about the great newspaper caper during the rest of my run and while getting ready for work. Then, as I'm about to leave, I looked out the window as I see this lady driving down the street again, and as she gets to our house, my now previously-read paper flies out and lands on the driveway like nothing ever happened.

So now I'm not sure if I should be angry that she stole my paper, or happy that she found it so important to stay current on politics, business, etc., that she would resort to "borrowing" my newspaper.

Needless to say, I grabbed today's paper and put it inside as soon as I went out to stretch.

Our home, 1 year later

Our realtor had an interesting idea to take a picture in front of your house every year to see how the house changes and how you change. Since our house is new, nothing has really changed since last year. Here's how we have changed.

I thought this was a good idea, and we'll try to make it a tradition.

August, 2007

August, 2008

DCEO, One Year Removed

It has been just over a year since I left my job at the Illinois Department of Commerce and Economic Opportunity. From what I read in the paper and hear from friends in Springfield, Governor Blago and the legislative leaders have the state even more screwed up than when I left.

One of the big differences in my current position is that there is not a constant need for information at all hours of the night. In Springfield, my Blackberry would be buzzing and ringing at all hours of the day and night - typically for information that had been provided several times previously.

So for those of you still toiling in the trenches of Springfield, I wanted to send you a picture of me working on the St. Louis version of the Blackberry...

Bad Boys

Rock Hill is a small town to the northeast of us. We've heard rumors that one of the police officers there dates and signs 2 full ticket books before beginning his shift, and frequently stops people for driving 31 mph in a 30 mph zone. This has been confirmed by some other police officers I've talked to, and some firemen we know. I wish I had a picture of this guy - riding his police motorcycle with full riding boots, channeling officer Frank Poncherello. You know it's bad when the lady working the window of Starbucks even talks about him.

But police work in Rock Hill isn't all bad. The weekly crime report, written by the police department and published in the local paper, is hilarious.

Here are some excerpts from this week's paper:

ROCK HILL

• Officers responded to the 300 block of Lithia Avenue Aug. 7 for a spat between a boyfriend and girlfriend involving five youths. Officers observed the individuals in a truculent posture towards each other and intervened before any fisticuffs could take place. Two of the individuals continued to perform and were taken into custody for failure to comply and for possession of marijuana. Their next act was held at the Rock Hill Hilton (jail) awaiting bond.
  
  
• Officers responded to the parking lot of Stein Mart, 9610 Manchester Road, Aug. 11 for an employee's vehicle making a loud noise. The driver told the officer she worked all day, and when she started her vehicle to go home it sounded like a racecar. The officers found the catalytic converter had been cut off the vehicle. The incredulous employee asked who would do such a thing. The officer explained that a certain element of our society, who would rather waste more energy stealing than working, cut it off for its scrap metal value.
  
  
• Officers on patrol discovered a horde of local crackheads and dealers milling about Aug. 12 on Eldridge Avenue at Plateau Avenue. Fearing they were about to commit despicable acts of crime or evil, police disbanded the group and kept watch on the area.
  
  
• Officers responded to the 1000 block of North Rock Hill Road Aug. 13 for an out-of-control juvenile. When officers walked though the door the brat morphed into a very complying young man.